pick a side

The other day I decided to take a trip down memory lane and read some of my old blog posts. Well, I ended up reading like 100 from over a year ago. I realized how my blog posts used to be a million times more interesting, and I realized that's because I used to be better at sharing the thoughts deeper inside my heart. I guess it's safe to say that I've changed a lot the last two years. Just a little realization. I will try to be better at blogging whats really on my mind. Wish me luck.

So, lately I've been thinking a lot about the terms selflessness and selfishness. These paradoxical terms go hand in hand when determining the nature of a person. I realize, it is impossible to be both. It's the same thing as knowing that "No man can serve two masters "(Matt 6:24). These contradictory terms are the foundation for interaction with other people. Lately I have been surrounded by people who, to me, appear either very selfish, or very selfless. I can't help but want to be surrounded by those people who are only selfless. People who get caught up over the tiniest details and spend their life making sure everything is completely fair in all directions, I find to be very selfish.

Newsflash. Life just isn't fair, and it is impossible to make sure that everything is equal 100% of the time. Selfishness doesn't always mean wanting the most or wanting the best, it sometimes just means not being willing to give a little bit extra, or not realizing how being so self-centered can hurt others, or spending so much time worrying about how you can be successful that you forget to notice the things you are doing to reach that success are hurting others. Selflessness, on the other hand, only ever results in blessings. The person who is willing to give the last few dollars to pay for something, or the person who is willing to make a sacrifice to make sure someone else is able to succeed means a lot. The person who is willing to give advice over and over and listen to others over and over without ever being asked if they need anything. Small acts of daily sacrifice and kindness can make a world of difference. Being surrounded by both of these characteristics has made me question myself: which master am I serving?

When put into that context, it appears quite clear which master I want to be serving. Selflessness comes from God, and selfishness comes from the devil. There really isn't any other way to say it. When it's put that way, I choose God. Every.single.time.

I do find myself getting caught up on little things that don't matter often, and I want to stop. I want to be the person who is willing to make that sacrifice for other people.  I'm far from perfect, but learning a little bit about these two words and experiencing the effects of them has really been eye opening. Being selfless doesn't mean you have to donate your life savings to a charity. It doesn't mean to let others walk all over you. It simply means being open minded enough to see that the tiniest details really don't matter. Being willing to help someone out if they need it, and being aware enough to realize it before they have to ask.  It means buying the bracelet from the little kiddos in Mexico even though you already have five. They are only a dollar anyway. It means taking care of yourself and your things so no one else has to do it for you. It means giving spare change to the beggars on the street, because you know what? No one really knows for sure that they are going to be spending that money on drugs an alcohol. It means thinking about yourself less so you can realize how your actions are impacting other people. It means buying the cookies from the girl scout trying to raise money. It means not spending so much time thinking about how you can make your own life better, and maybe thinking about how you can make the life of someone else just a little bit easier. Now, I'm sure it's easier said than done, but theres no harm in making a good effort. I'm starting today.

+

Okay, I'm done now.

I have an announcement.

Dear Blogworld and those of you who are not apart of the blogworld but creep my blog anyway,

I think it's time ya'll know.

I am a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints.

We are often known as "Mormons"

but that does not define everything we are.

I want to write a bit on what I believe know.

God knows me.

He knows what makes me sad.

He knows why I cry.

He knows my fears.

He knows how I feel. 

Every minute of every day.

He knows what brings me complete happiness.

He wants to help me to keep that happiness

forever.

"For God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.

For God sent not his Son into the world to condemn the world; but that the world through him might be saved."

John 3:16-17

I know that I make mistakes.

I am far from perfect.

I think the wrong thing.

I say the wrong thing.

I do the wrong thing.

I am who I am.

But I know

that there is a way to become clean again.

I know

Christ suffered all I have suffered for my sins so I am able to have eternal life.

I know

that by staying close to God, and keeping His commandments

He will help me remain on the right path.

He will help me make decisions.

He will comfort me when I am sad.

He will calm my troubled heart.

He will bless me.

and He will forgive me.
People can judge my mistakes.
They can judge my actions.
They can judge me for things I say or things I do.
Things I might have said in the past. Or done in the past.
But that doesn't matter 

because I know

if I keep the commandments,

I will be able to return to my Father in Heaven again.

I will be able to thank His son for all that he suffered for me.

I will be able to experience joy beyond mortal comprension.

I will be able to be with my family

forever.

I will be able to be with the love of my life

—whomever he may be—

forever.

I also know that YOU can have this happiness and knowledge too.
By simply asking in faith
you will receive the same knowledge.

I say these things in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

makes sense.

The other day my roommate was giving our FHE lesson and she was elaborating on a talk that was given in an Ensign from 1999. I'm afraid I don't know the talk and when I asked her she couldn't find it. Excuse me for not giving the wise soul who spoke these words the proper credit. If I ever find it again I'll be sure to come edit this. What's important is the fabulous words that were spoken that have stuck with me all week.

"Real love is charity, and it is only obtained through the love of Christ. When exercising charity, we come to know a person's heart. When we know a person's heart, we are different. We won't judge them. We won't hold grudges. We won't take offense. We will simply love them."

I've got to stop thinking.

source.

but it kind of all makes sense, right?

life is freaking awesome.

HONESTLY. I can't even express it. I don't even know where to start. Life is perfect. 

I love my family so much. I have the best parents in the world. 

I am going to share a funny story about my daddy.

For those of you who know my dad well, you might understand how great this was because you can probably picture the whole scenario.

So the power went out yesterday at 10:30pm while I was at work. I got home around 11:00 to a completely dark house.. except for a bright light in my kitchen. Low and behold, my father was wearing one of these contraptions on his head.

Please just picture it. He was happy as a clam, reading a book, with a headlight across his shiny bald forehead.

I love him so very much. I laughed for a very long time. He then said decided to let me use it so I could get ready for bed. What a kind soul. 

My mom is the best. She lets me cuddle with her even though I am 19. She knows me inside and out. She is the best ever. She is happy when I am happy.

There is a lot of happiness in my house right now. 

My parents love me so much. :)

I love my friends. 

Today, I went to the temple for the first time in way way way way too long. I went with the institute, which was fabulous, because I got to be there with my closest friends.

Plus, one of my closest friends Ryan did the confirmations, and another friend Taylor did the baptizing. 

It is so great to see these boys I have grown up with being able to perform temple ordinances. I love life. I love my friends. I love the gospel. I love the temple.

Cody is the best. He is doing well incase anyone is wondering. He loves Puerto Rico. I actually have a friend who knows his companion. She even kissed him before. What are the chances right!

To top it off, I get to go to a fireside tomorrow night to hear Elder Richard G. Scott speak to the YSA. Ummmm.. YAY! 

I just loved his talk at General Conference. I cannot WAIT until tomorrow night.

I believe this is necessary.

I got this idea from this blog post. I think it is truly necessary, and I am so happy I am able to take this pledge.

=) 

Feel free to take the pledge as well..

Click the image to join in!

 AS A KIND-HEARTED BLOGGER I PLEDGE TO:

• create, inspire, and admire rather than compete with fellow bloggers
• be understanding of each other-- in the blogging community, as well as in the world
• stay away from internet/blogging bullying
• speak my opinion freely, while still being mindful of other's feelings-- be tactful.
• make an effort--no matter how big or small the gesture, to spread kindness or joy to others
• acknowledge that I will make mistakes, (I am only human) but remember to learn from them
• know that at times I will post about the negative stuff in life, and maybe even some complaining (I am only human) but I will always follow up with something happy/positive too.
• believe that this world is a good place, filled with good people.

check check check.

Okay well let me start off with a summary of how my March went. I'd say I was fairly successful. Not perfect though. There is always next month!

- My room is a mess. I cleaned it really good twice, but it didn't last. I know, I'm terrible.

- I am still waiting to hear back from a few places for a summer job... but I officially have a plan C now if both of them don't work out.

- No quilt. Oh well.

- I went shopping. Don't tell my parents.. I only bought things that were on sale though. :)

- So I didn't save 99% of my earnings. More like 80%... which is a lot better than before. I feel like I've made progress.

- I didn't wash my mom's car because it is still so muddy outside. I did clean out the inside of it though.

- I donated to a children's charity. Not much, but hey. I still did it with the ideas of my March goals in mind. 

- I made breakfast, lunch, and dinner every day since Wednesday for three girls I'm babysitting. Not to mention I taught the youngest one how to ride a two-wheeler? Bonus points, thanks.

- my treadmill is officially part of my exercise routine. Unfortunately the TV in front of it only gets the business channel. You'd think I would be very educated in the stock market these days, but I'm really just not. I think I tune out the TV.

- I don't exercise how I originally planned, but I have an official exercise routine. I can tell its making a difference. My butt has been sore for two weeks. Progresssss! :)

- J Biebs. Check. Also brought along three more friends to infect them with the fever.

- so the not sleeping in one was a failure. I won't go into details.

- choreography: done.

- institute every week. yes yes yes and yes.

I'd say it was a successful month. 

Inspired by conference this past weekend, I am officially making a To Be list instead of a To Do list for this month.

1. Be non-judemental. This is something I have been working on for a while. I get very upset when I feel I am being judged, so I know I need to stop judging others.

2. Be efficient. I need to stop being lazy on some days and get out of bed at a normal time and use my time wisely. If I spent as much time serving others as I do on facebook, the world would be a happy place. Also. if I spent as much time exercising as I did on my blog?.. ya. I won't even go there. It's time to use my time better.

3. Be clean.  I am going to make a conscious effort to only handle each thing once, meaning I need to put things away instead of just dropping them on the floor. Keep my room clean, help with dishes, put my make up away.. the easy stuff that clutters my space. I'm sick of it!

4. Be friendly. I could probably say thank you a million more times a day. I could probably have a smile on my face more often. 

I'm not sure how I will keep track of these, but I am definitely putting out a conscious effort to be a better person this month.. specifically in these ways. Hopefully there will be specific situations that I can write about on my blog. :) Wish me luck.

+

good good good.

I have so many thoughts and emotions today. I am in such the best mood. I don't think anything could get me down.

General Conference. I love. I always have, but it was different this year. I don't know if it is because I have finally grown up enough to have the desire to listen to every word, but for some reason I just cannot get enough. Oh, and PS. Has the Tabernacle Choir always been that impressive? Oh my word. I have never felt the spirit so strong while listening to them as I did this morning during The Spirit of God.

I removed my followers from my profile. I am sorry, but it had to be done. I was getting too caught up in the numbers and it was taking away from my joy of blogging. I blog because it makes me happy. Yes, I love followers and knowing that people like to read what I say, but it isn't my purpose for blogging. If you want to follow my blog you will have to use the follow button at the top of the page instead of the follow box. Perhaps I will add my box of followers again someday. Perhaps I will have lost some, or gained some, but it really doesn't matter to me. I really just blog for the sake of enjoying blogging, and I need to keep it that way.

Cody is going to come home someday. It may be a long time from now, but eventually it will happen. I miss my best friend, but not the kind of missing him as in I wish he were here. I just miss him. I am excited to be able to see him again someday.

I have made some of the best friendships the past couple weeks and months. People I have known for so long but have never been close with. Being here has let me become close with people I never thought I would be close with. I am going to miss Ryan and Jared when they leave. I have grown so close to these boys. I'm not there are many other people in the world I could talk to like I can talk to these boys. I am so blessed to have such great men as friends.

In April 2013, I will have a career. I hope 2012 is not the end of the world.

I love my parents. Being home this year has been hard on me, but it has strengthened me. If I would have known in high school that I would be spending my first graduated year at home with my parents, I would NOT have been okay with it. Guess what. It has been the best year of my life so far. My parents are becoming my best friends. I have to have a visit with them every day. Our relationship has been strengthened so much.

I am so blessed. Everything is falling into place. I have made decisions I never thought I would make. I am going places I ever only dreamed to be going. Life is so exciting at this time in my life. Yes, it is hard, every single day, but it is going to be so worth it.

second, first.

Second best part of today:

ask for source

Napping to Joshua Radin.

Four, glorious hours of:

You Got What I Need

Only You

Closer

When You Find Me

What If You

Everything'll Be Alright

Lovely Tonight

Someone Else's Life

Paperweight

Best part of today:

Living Water - Simon Dewey

Testimony Meeting. 

I am so grateful to live where I do.

And so blessed to have the friends and family that I have.

Enough said. 

It's hard to live up to something that isn't real, isn't it?

Lately I have had a lot of thoughts on the issue of the self-image girls have of themselves. Then I read a couple blog posts and it inspired me to write something of my own. First of all.. you should read the posts that inspired me to write this post. THIS, and THIS. It is seriously all so true...

 source.

Do you believe that once upon a time I dated a boy who told me he preferred blondes to brunettes...? It's true. This same boy later told me that he had a weight category for his future wife. 107lbs - 114lbs. The worst part is I didn't even realize at the time just how cruel that was for him to say. Does he plan on his wife giving him children??... Seriously. It makes me cringe. It is truly disgusting.. and I am so happy I am no longer involved with that boy even the slightest, and I am sorry for whatever girl thinks that she has to live her entire life falling into his "weight category". Another boy I dated even earlier in life continuously teased me because about my "squishy" stomach. He said he loved that it was squishy, and I honestly think he truly believed he was making me more confident by telling me that he liked my flaws, but a girl hearing that she is "squishy" isn't exactly endearing.....?

I just want to quickly point out that I am not blaming boys for being the cause of eating disorders or poor self-esteem. It has been scientifically proven that girls with eating disorders don't logically understand the concept of food and calories even if it is explained to them a million times. They truly have a distorted image of themselves. It is a disease. It can't be cured with a few positive comments of how beautiful they are; however, boys can certainly influence for the better or the worse. I find that never talking about the size of a girl in general is the best way to avoid that. Even if you are talking about a different girl, or a random person in passing... the girls you are with will hear. She will analyze, and she will compare.. Am I right girls?

Lucky for me, I have been strong thus far in life,  and I haven't given in to the media and magazines and believed what is portrayed as a "perfect" body... but I have certainly been close. How could I not? Everyone girl in the world has seen a picture of Megan Fox and witnessed how the guys literally drool over her. And yes boys, hearing how beautiful the air-brushed movie stars are affects us. That gives us something to compare ourselves to, and do you know how hard it is to compare yourself to a photoshopped/airbrushed photo? Yes, media does this to males as well. Try it sometime... Go into Abercrombie and Fitch and compare your body to the models you see on the walls. It's hard to live up to something that isn't real, isn't it.

Of course this sort of thing affects me. Yes.. I have gone through phases where my scale is my best friend. I have been involved in some severe calorie counting, and certainly had my share of negative thoughts about my body. I have had close friends who have struggled with eating disorders and self-confidence issues when it comes to their weight or body shape. I have had at least three close friends personally confide in me about an eating disorder, and I know there are even more. This isn't just something that is heard on TV or read about in books. These issues are honestly right under your nose.

I guess I just want to tell everyone how I have come to peace with myself. First of all, I have been active my entire life. Exercise is truly so important. Not just to be strong, or to have a perfect body, or because everyone else exercises, but because it keeps your body going. It revitalizes you. It strengthens you. It makes you feel good about yourself. I will admit, I struggle with this whole exercising business. Doesn't curling up on the couch with a box of Lindors and The Notebook sound so much more appealing than running on a treadmill?.... Sure, when I was little I ran around 90% of the day, and through Junior High and High School I was either dancing or playing sports. I have found that now I am not exercising as much, I have seen my body change. I do need to make a conscious effort to exercise more and here it is in writing.. I am going to be better from now on.

I have come awfully close to hating my body. It truly isn't how it used to be. Yes, I am only 19 and I'm sure when I am 45 and have six kids I will read this and laugh, but honestly it has changed. I just can't fit into size zero pants folks. Even if I was just skin and bone, it wouldn't work. I have hips. I have a soft stomach that you can even squeeze. It is just the way I am. That's how girls are made.

What has helped me be at peace with my body, is the fact that it is a gift from God. My body was given to me to maintain. It was given to me so at the appropriate time, I can be the home for a developing child. God has trusted me to be able to bear His children, and I think I owe it to Him to at least love myself. Being strong and healthy is just one way I can make sure I am capable of being able to have children someday. I truly can't imagine being so selfish today and starving my body of essential vitamins and minerals just to be skinny. I am not saying this so insult girls with this issue. Trust me. I am just saying that with myself, that has been the thing that has helped me accept who I am and love myself. Girls, can you please just imagine someday, having to look your husband in the eye, and tell him you aren't able to have children and knowing exactly why? Can you imagine thinking back to the day you sat kneeling in front of the toilet and purging the food that you had consumed? Can you think back to the aching teeth and trembling hands and the self-hating as you convinced yourself you could maintain your body without food? The results are truly this dramatic. The thought of my body being constantly prepared to give birth to a child someday is truly the one thing that helps me love myself. What a privilege it will be to one day be able to have a beautiful child of my own. I know that by eating what I am supposed to, and by exercising and keeping myself strong and healthy, I am showing God that I am grateful for his gift to me.

For those girls, and boys, out there who are struggling.. you really can get help. Ask someone you trust or someone who loves you. I promise there is someone who will support you.
Your body is a gift. Please remember that. =)

ask for source.

what do ya know.

Okay. It's time to come clean. This is my blog. I can write what I want, and this is what I want to write. No judgements, yeah?

My whole life, I've stood on one side of an argument that has been brought up many times. I don't know if it was just my positive attitude, or possibly negative attitude, or if I was simply naive. I never wavered, and lived my life around the notion that this part of me wouldn't change. I never frowned upon people who had opinions different than my own, because it was just that, an opinion. I truly don't believe there is a right or wrong answer when it comes to an issue such as this because every situation truly is different, but I always stood firmly in my position. Here I am, nineteen years, one month and eleven days old.. and I feel like the hugest hypocrite. Something I never thought would happen to me, a situation I lived my life to avoid, a place I never thought I would be and feelings I never thought I would have.. well. Hi. It's nice to meet all of you?
Okay, so that was a little bit dramatic, and no it isn't that extreme. You see, I have stayed firm in my beliefs regarding the circumstances, and that probably won't ever change.. but yes, I was that girl that said goodbye to a missionary. Her missionary.

I have never been opposed to girls "waiting" for missionaries, or dating before a guy left. I understand why people do, and why people don't. For me individually, I always just figured I wouldn't be in that situation. I never wanted to be that girl that sent off a missionary. I have known girls to wait, and to have everything work out, happily ever after. I have seen girls stick through the two years only to find out that when her missionary comes home, it just isn't right. I have seen girls promise things to guys and then turn around a few months later and forget anything they had ever said. I never wanted to put a guy in that situation either, where he would have to wonder whether or not I would be around when he got home. I am a believer in the fact that, what's meant to be will work itself out, if you work for it of course and if you do what's right. All I knew, is that I didn't want to be placed in this situation. I never imagined myself to be the girl who shed tears at a farewell, or the girl who woke up during the night from six different dreams all similar in the sense that they were goodbye dreams, or that girl who checked the mailbox over and over again. I didn't want to be that girl. I'm no good at goodbyes, and I never wanted to have to say goodbye without knowing whether or not goodbye was forever, or just for a couple years. But somehow, here I am.

I dated Cody about a year ago. We dated for a few months, and both decided it wasn't right at the time for a number of reasons I won't get into, but one main reason being, he needed to focus on serving a mission.. also I didn't want to be that girl. (To anyone who reads my blog and isn't a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, look here to find out more about my religion and missionaries.) We broke up in April, and honestly, remained friends. It was tough at first. No matter what, break-ups are hard. I certainly made my share of mistakes, and he did the same, but we still stayed in contact. A few months later, we were best friends. And that was great. I had the perfect summer. Things were always a little bit complicated for the two of us. I did previously date his best friend, and sure, judge all you want, but things just happened that way, alright? We had some rough times but we certainly had our share of fabulous memories together. Time passed and we became very close. No, we weren't "dating".. but we were about as close as you can get in every other way. Honest and truly the best of friends. To make a long story short, Cody got his mission call, and due to the difficulty of getting Visas to the States, he didn't end up leaving in August like originally planned. He spent his fall preparing in many ways to sacrifice two years of his life in the service of our Father in heaven. The longer he was here, the more ready he was to leave, and also, the closer we got. I truly began to rely on him daily. We knew eventually a goodbye would come, so we did our best to distance ourselves and try to not get overly attached. The closer it got to the end though, the harder it was to not be around each other.


Confession: the longest we have even gone without seeing each other since we dated last January is eleven days. Yep. I went to Vancouver this summer on a trip with my choir, and that was the longest. Eleven days isn't very long. haha... so wish me luck.

Anyway. So his Visa finally came, and the day arrived to say goodbye. I have received the question thousands of times, "Are you going to wait for him?" And seriously, I don't mind people asking. Naturally, people are curious. The answer to that question, just so everyone knows, I don't know. We are both aware that people can change drastically in a few years. And yes, I do love him. How could I not? I had a conversation with his cousin Serena (she is in grade six) last night that went something like this:


Serena: So do you still like Cody?
Janeen: haha, of course. Cody is my best friend.
Serena: So are you going to still like him even though he's gone? Are you going to wait for him?
Serena: Sorry about the incomfortable questions.
Janeen: Haha, it's fine. You can ask me anything you'd like. I didn't promise Cody I 'd wait for him, because he needs to focus more on being a good missionary rather than whether or not I am dating someone.. but if I'm still around when he gets home, I'm sure we'll go on a date.
Serena: Yeah.. that's so cool! You're my hero!

When she asked me, my first thought was, how the heck do I explain something like this to someone who is what.. twelve? Then I realized, there is only one way to explain, because there is only one answer. So I said goodbye last night before he got set apart. I cried as I drove home. I kept one of his shirts. I wrote him a goodbye letter, and gave him a goodbye hug. I cry when people ask me how I am, and I cry when people don't. I don't like being this girl, but I am. I guess that is just life though. It is never what you expect.

I do know that Cody is going to be such a great missionary. His decision to serve a mission has impacted so many people in such a great way, and I am so proud of his choices and the sacrifices he has made to get to this point. I love him, and I love his immediate and extended family. His little brother Carson feels like my little brother these days, and I feel somewhat protective of him.. so really.. He deserves more than shallow flirting so any of you girls who have bad intentions with him... cut it out. jjus kidding. Anyway. I am somewhat embarrassed to be this girl, and more than anything, I am so so excited for Cody and the things he is going to get to experience the next couple years. So for everyone who is wondering, there you have it. Yes, I love Cody Clay and I'm not afraid to admit that. Yes, he is my best friend. No, I didn't promise I would wait for him.. but I am going to live my life in such a way that I will end up with the person I am supposed to end up with, regardless of who that is.. and I certainly, am not going to settle for less than the best.. and so far, Cody is the best.

ask for source.

it was a good day.

It was a perfect day. Not one of those days where everything fell into place, or one of those days that something unusually epic happened. Everything was just right. It was peaceful. It was happy, and it was beautiful. It was serene and relaxing, and it was simply wonderful.

.

I have never been more proud of any of my friends as I was today watching Cody Clay speak. He is going to be the best missionary.. and yes, of course I am going to miss him... he is my best friend. He is my rock and my vault. He knows all my secrets, and I think he knows me better than anyone. I will miss him, yes, but I can't wait for him to leave.. because there is nowhere else in the world he needs to be. =) 

On the other hand, life is a never ending puzzle these days. Things that make me completely joyful have the ability to fill me with sadness. Things that hurt me, seem to somehow make me happy. Things that I used to find important have slowly dropped to the bottom of my priority list, and things that used to linger on the back burner of my brain have scooted their way to the front and center of my thoughts. Every day I become increasingly scared of life to carry forward, but at the same time, the days can't go fast enough.  Things I was once sure I wanted have become the very things I want least in life. I seem to just get one thing figured out, but it doesn't matter because another mystery appears.. a mystery bigger and scarier and more complicated and harder to solve. I suppose that keeps things exciting; however, as puzzling as life is, I have found that from day to day, some things just fit, no matter what.

source.

Day 3

Day 3 - I feel like I've written a few posts about my parents, which makes sense how I always take part in these little challenges. My parents are great. Sometimes we don't get along, but when we do? We really get along. Setting aside everything worldly and frustrating and everything we don't agree on, my parents are always there when I really need them, for the things that really matter. =)

So. I heard this quote today. 

"To ease another's heartache is to forget one's own." - Abraham Lincoln.

What a brilliant man, right?

source undisclosed.

I think that ends up being more often than not.

Sometimes its smiling despite the tears and saying the things necessary to make another happy in the long run is what really matters. Sometimes I struggle with this, but every once in a while I really remember that some things are important right now and some things aren't. What really matters is that everyone is happy in the long run. Maybe? Well. Maybe for today.

11, 12, 13

I've kind of fallen behind on this challenge. I really wish that meant my social life was so fabulous that I've been too busy to post.

Unfortunately, that isn't the case.

Oh well.

Day 11-Favorite tv shows

Gossip Girl

because who else dresses as wonderfully as Blair Waldorf?

and because he's Chuck Bass..

Grey's Anatomy

because every episode makes me cry.

and because Derek Shepherd is a perfect character..

Gilmore Girls

because it's so hilarious even though you don't expect it to be.

and because Paul Anka (the dog)..

Friends

because you can see an episode a million times and it's just as funny

and because Phoebe Buffet.

Pretty Little Liars

because everyone has their secrets

and because it reminds me of the summer

90210

because sometimes I see snapshots of Hollywood and it reminds me of how hot California is

and because it keeps me up to date with clothing trend changes.

The OC

because it was the first TV series I ever really got into

and because Seth Cohen and his curly hair.

... you get the picture. 

TV shows have kind of been an escape for me over the past few years of my life. Judge me all you want. My pathetic and embarrassing addiction is under control.

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Day 12-What you believe

I believe in miracles.

I believe that things will work out the way they are supposed to in the end.

I believe that working hard has good results.

I believe that every person needs occasional alone time.

I believe in love.

I believe that unconditional love is the key to successful friendships and relationships.

I believe in forgiveness.

I believe in God. 

To find out more about my religious beliefs, click here, or of course, just ask me. =)

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Day 13-Goals

Although my short term goals have all changed drastically in the past few months as life has taken some unexpected twists and turns, my long term goals have never changed.

Get married in the temple.

Raise a beautiful family.

Be soooo happy.

As for the rest.. we'll have to see.