8.03.2010

You don't know.


I saw this picture and sentence quite a while ago, and immediately decided I would probably need it someday. Sometimes I browse through my pictures and stop when I come to this one. I have debated using it many times, but I can't ever quite settle with this one. Today, it is perfect.

"Things are not always as they seem" - Phaedrus
"Never judge a man until you walk a mile in his shoes." - English proverb

You know how it goes; we hear these quotes all the time. Do we understand them? Do we live by them? Truth is.. we honestly can't judge anyone. We can't judge a situation. Sure, maybe we think we understand. Even if we see someone do something crazy, and even if we think we know why they did it.. we don't. We can't think we do, because hiding deep inside of each name is a story. Maybe it is something that happened a week ago. Maybe a month ago, or even a year ago. Maybe it is a thousand things that have happened over the course of a year.  Maybe we've heard what happened. So and so said this, or so and so saw this. Maybe we even saw something obvious, but misunderstood.

You know what? No one has lived my life, except for me. No one has experienced the little things, the little pains and the little heartbreaks that I have suffered. No one completely understands the little things that make me happy, or the little things that make me cry. No one understands how many times I have cried myself to sleep because of pure devastation, or cried tears of joy because of the witnessing of a complete miracle. No one knows the cutting comments that have torn open my heart, and no one knows the simple promises of forever that I have received. No one knows how hard I have tried to stay strong, and to be tough. Maybe I haven't even tried either. No one knows except me. No one knows the tiny incidents. No one has read my saved texts, or listened to my saved voicemails. No one knows if I even have saved texts or voicemails for that matter. No one knows the promises I've made, or the promises I have broken. No one has experienced love just like I have, and no one has experienced heartbreak just like I have. Everyone lives life differently, has their own perspective, and everyone experiences things differently. Sure, we are all people and we all experience similar emotions, but every individual is different, and everyone has secrets, and everyone has trials. Perhaps you think I do things for certain reasons. Perhaps you think I am dramatic because of jealousy, or crying because of immaturity. Perhaps you think that the sweet little girl whom I know nothing about has got under my skin. You know what? She hasn't. She is lovely, and I hope she knows that. Perhaps you think I do things to get a response, or so people will talk. You have this all wrong, so please don't assume anymore. The reason I do things go far beyond anyone's understanding. Unless you are me, you don't know. I am not perfect, but I am simply Jane and you don't know my story.. 
and I am okay with that.






1 comment:

  1. Dearest Jane. How brilliant. I am so entirely glad you are you and No one else. You are strong, and you are tough, and you are Jane and you are amazing :)

    ReplyDelete

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